Category: Counseling

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Shine His Light in Your Hearts

So much has happened since I last sat down to write a short note to you. Our ministry finally received the name change we applied for through the IRS, all organizational changes were completed without a hitch, I took impromptu trips to 3 small towns in Colorado, had overnight company, welcomed a new member to our ministry’s design team, and much more.

Throughout every process, so much was revealed to me of why I left the some-timey life of my casual walk with Christ to now having a pleasant marathon as I run with him, doing this work, and run toward him, every chance that I get. Gosh my heart leaps even now, to think of this beautiful and sweet relationship.

This time of the year, offers so much wonder and anticipation as we come closer to the birth of Jesus. On my evening drives, the beautiful decorations (I prefer white lights) are so touching to see. Christmas & candle light during the month of December carves out my journey to the coming of such a magnificent being, our Jesus. Among many other seasonal splendor, I cherish these so…

Whatever, your traditions are for Christmas, think of what the Apostle Paul wrote and likewise my prayer for you.

“My prayer is that light will flood your hearts and that you will understand the hope that was given to you when God chose you. Then you will discover the glorious blessings that will be yours together with all of God’s people.” ~ Ephesians 1:18 CEV

Always keep his Light in your heart.

With Love,

Charlotte

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Do Not Be Anxious

Meditating on HIS words: Joshua 1:8

November’s Theme: Gratitude

siyach or hagah

הֲגוֹת

Do Not Be Anxious

Relax and Focus: Find a quiet space to get ready to read the verses

Read: Philippians 4:6-7 “ (6)Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. (7) And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (NIV)

Reflect: Recent research completed by Amazon shared that the most popular Bible passages searched are those focused on how to heal anxiety. In fact, our chosen verses for this week were on the top of the list. With Thanksgiving just 3 weeks away, family anxiety, for some, is a real thing. It can be a painful experience to walk through the doors of family members and to try to keep it together. Yet, we know the primary mission of God is to trust him in all that we do. Anxiety is treated through clinical therapy, coupled with other alternative applications. Pastoral counseling is also a popular choice for some. There are many ways and steps to treat the symptoms.

From a Christian perspective, when faced with such anxiety, who do you turn to? Do you turn to friends, family, or do you turn to Him? God’s love is never alternative therapy. He should be the first one we turn to. The vast amount of love God has for us can be sometimes overwhelming when we believe that we are not worthy. Yet, he is the ultimate therapist.

The Apostle Paul wrote “do not be anxious about anything. As we move closer to Thanksgiving and Christmas reflect on these questions:

  • When I am feeling anxious, how can I make time to spend with the Lord?
  • How can I deal better, with the criticism from family members who do not know the Lord?
  • How can adjust my feelings to serve as teacher to those who don’t know God?

These are simple questions that may come with complex answers. The Apostle Paul who was in prison when he wrote these verses, peacefully summarized how he dealt with the issues of his time. Echo his teachings and practice how you can better apply them into your everyday  life.

Discern on the answers you’ve provided to these questions. Keep them near as a reference point for you during times of despair .

Rest: Rest your thoughts and consider ways you could move from anger, disappointment or feeling sorry for yourself.

Discuss: Share your findings with family members and friends who are open to listen. Be sure to discuss why this is important to you, and thank them for allowing you to share your thoughts and feelings.

Feel free to also share on the comment link below or by clicking on the facebook icon.

 

 

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Tradition: A Stepping Stone to Identity

November, the month Thanksgiving is celebrated in the United States, reminds us that we are part of a family. This family may be biological, a group of friends, or those in any environment that offer a sense of identity. The activities done and relationships formed in these settings, create traditions and acceptance, which help to define us.

During this time of the year, some select not to become involved with those who have bred them. This decision could be based on childhood trauma or because friends have become family. Just in the last few years, I have noticed recipe and gift suggestions on how to have a successful “Friendsgiving” celebration. Many people are now choosing to celebrate the Thanksgiving holiday in this manner, rather than doing so with family. I don’t believe that there’s anything wrong with this choice. In fact, I support it, especially for those who have lost loved ones and continue to cope with this lost. Lost, remember, appear in all forms. Whatever that may look like for you, I offer up prayers.

Albeit, those who prefer to simply be removed from family at this time, should remember that it is impossible to keep running from what is preventing you from facing  the underlying issues. Sometimes you may feel that you can overcome with all you’ve got, and other times the fetal position in bed, will do just fine. As Christian women, we too are tested as we hold on to this consistently-known tradition of identity, while carrying the heaviness of the suit of armour, worn to fight off the enemy.

What we also know is that God approves of us, because he loves us unconditionally. Conversely, he favors peace, love, and forgiveness more than anything.  Despite this acknowledgement, you may not be able to find it in your heart to carry out what he expects from all of us. And, he may even understand that you should be given more time. In this case, consider, writing a note or sending a card to your loved ones wishing them a Happy Thanksgiving. God will work through this gesture to begin the healing process. This could very possibly be the most important step to free you from burdened-despair.

Stepping stones, guide us on chosen paths. Add this one to the concrete identity of finding perfect peace; the kind Jesus referred to when he directed us a women… to hold on to (Luke 7:50).

I testify, right here and now, that this is possible. If you are unsure how to move forward, call me to get a consult set up. I’d love to partner with you on this journey!

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving celebration.

With love,

Charlotte

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Wedding Planning Officiant Consultations

Often held in 2 sessions these are pre-planning discussion for your upcoming wedding. The cost of this service is usually deducted from the total costs of your wedding ceremony should Rev. Charlotte be asked to be your officiant. 55 minute sessions.

Wedding Plan Consultations $65.00

 

Pay-half with full payment due at the time of service $32.50

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Prophetic Leadership Consultations

A developmental process, we explore the richness that is outside yourself. We work to develop your future as a prophetic leader. Here, we also examine your own prophetic skills within you through thorough study of effective leaders of the Bible. 55 minute sessions

Prophetic Leadership Consultation $50.00

 

Pay-half with full payment due at the time of service $25.00

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Spiritual Direction Counseling

55 minute sessions where we explore areas of concern. We examine you understanding of your relationship with God and discern your movement in spiritual life. In addition, we may look at ways to maximize your God-given gifts and potential to be the best you and live your life purpose. Lastly, we could possibly, also explore current events such as life’s challenges, loss, work stress, family issues, upcoming events, marriage preparations, and other concerns.

Sliding scale offered for those with a limited budget.

Please visit our schedule links set a date and time before paying for this consultation.

$90.00

 

Pay Half- $45.00 with full payment at the time of service

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Empathy Toward Friends

Real friendships have the ability to change the world. Yes, I know that this may sound a bit quirky, but please bear with me as I share why. When friends are supportive of each other, this can make adjusting to some of life’s trials so much easier to maneuver through. A listening and empathetic ear, can often put a chaotic heart at ease. Sometimes people just need our soft presence and not one of judgment or criticism.

Providing these elements of kindness, refreshes the soul of a friend who needs it. Loyalty, honesty, and compassion from one person to another can break down barriers of protection that others may not have been able to chip through. A real friend can bring out the inherent beauty once embedded in the heart of another. When this beauty is revealed…watch out…as it will be filtered into daily interactions, creating a stream of kindness through those who are open to the positive effects this expression brings.

Real friends uphold accountability in strengths and weaknesses as an important aspect to flourish and grow. Be grateful for your true friend, as she is invaluable.

Enjoy your October!

Charlotte

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Purpose of Respect

Ever been in a situation where you quickly became aware that a decision you’ve made was not the right one for your well-being? And, in making the choice to bow-out gracefully, you then realize that you are the one who is ridiculed for this conclusion you know is best for your growth and mental self-care.

In many professional and work situations, circumstances such as this one, are usually prompted by a lack of respect toward you; despite your knowledge, work, or careful nature. When experienced, it is clearly a form of microinvalidation, even though you hold optimum knowledge in your field. According to Sue (2017), microinvalidation is a form of microaggression that excludes or negates a person’s thoughts or feelings.

In considering the reasons you shouldn’t bow out, you often tell yourself this too shall pass. And, this reasoning to stay in becomes as a struggle. This struggle may appear as problems in your relationships, and may lead to health challenges due to stress and insufficient rest .

Garnered behavioral patterns when faced with such situations require integrity toward yourself as you continue on the path of who God has made you to be. Your careful actions should always be above reproach. Criticism from those who choose to disrespect you, should never be allowed to damper your spirits. Through your strength in God and your attitude, you may be building someone else’s faith, to assist him or her, to believe that God is our savior and partner in all of the unfortunate issues in this life.

Respect yourself as you respect those who verbally harm you. As we move toward God’s Light, it is the only way to clear the path toward the carefully-crafted love of God has for us.

Enjoy this beautiful month of September!

Rev. M. Charlotte Oliver

Sue, D. (2017). Microaggressions and marginality: Manifestation, dynamics, and impact. Hoboken, NJ;Wiley.